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holes in my skin

muahah [13 Apr 2003|01:30pm]
[ mood | awake ]

Alright 1) I have blurty names, lj names, ujournal names.. ECT If you want one ask me to give you the list. 2) I do make layouts for blurty accounts only if the account is Early adopter, Perm, or Paid. 3) I do also make icons. 4) If you already have a blurty go to it and add 403.. I will automatically add you. alright =]

holes in my skin

mk [09 Apr 2003|06:24am]
already so i killed ppl off my friendslist.. and yeah my blurty is 403 :]

holes in my skin

AHS [10 Feb 2003|05:44pm]
[ mood | bitchy ]

SORRY !@# I havent been updating erg I'm single and I have a blurty.. decay.blurty.com > go check it out !

holes in my skin

mk [04 Jan 2003|11:55pm]
[ mood | artistic ]

sorry i havent updated in forever a lot of shits been going on Jordan asked me out today thats g you know? but yeah heres a new poem i wrote for myself enjoy..

dont grab me by my arms
ive been raped the chance of fate
dont hug me with your smiles
ive walked alone for every mile
dont speak your love to me
your voice has lost its volume
your not something i need.
quit trying to save me
i lost my true self along the way
im too dead to even cry
i crawl but i get only as far as another lie
the web has been spun
and im the spiders prey
it doesnt bother me..
i was never promised the kingdom of gods
just kept walking along and making friends with frauds
dont tempt me with your false conclusion
didnt you notice they i was just apart of an illusion?

holes in my skin

Wind blows. [30 Dec 2002|07:06am]
[ mood | awake ]

Have you noticed what is happening
The Earth is slow crashing
As we burn it and defy it
Mother Earth is slowly dying.
Everything is changing just as people do
The birds are slowly flying
up and down and all around they come and go
Just as the wind blows.
Have you noticed that the animals are disappearing
We act like its a hoodini show..
But we killed them just as the wind blows.
We could of have helped them Simple and Easy
But I guess saving animals is just to Cheesy.
When we could be paying millions to people just like you and me
Who act for us and get awards just for appearing in our movies.
Or how about those people who said they loved to play the game
That no matter how rich they got it would never be just about fame
Think about it.. if they took their money and put it for a good cause
Instead of sitting on it and just saving it there with a pause
We could be helping Earth.. but nothing really changes no..
Everything will just keep disappearing as the winds blow.

holes in my skin

more poems! [23 Dec 2002|11:33pm]
[ mood | happy ]

Subj: poem!
Date: 12/23/02 5:33:30 AM Central Standard Time
From: Jewish kids
To: Mark Smokes Dro

Before I met you

Before I met you it was all about parties and whiskey
It was never where I had someone to love who'd actually miss me..
You know I think about you all the time
You can tell by the way my face lights up when I say your mine.
I never smiled quite like this before..
And even if someone took the stars from the sky
I wouldn't care, because since I met you I don't have to wish upon them anymore.

Before I met you I was the girl the world forgot
and somewhere inbetween the sunrising and the moonsetting
you found me and rescued me
I feel like I'm in a trance I never knew how real love could be
Never knew it, that is until I met you..
The love your giving me is so pure and true
Do you know the things you can do? Or do you have no clue?

Before I met you there was no hope for me
I was at the end of my journey with no place else to go
life sucked and the pain I had been holding was starting to show
that was until I met you, Thats when everything became clear
I put my best foot forward and for the first time being inlove wasnt a fear.
I pledge to you this very day..
That even if clouds should come
and the sky should turn gray
I'll be there to make your sky blue
For Mark Kenneth I have fallen in love with you.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

My baby sent me this poem at 11:27 pm 12/23/02 in an instant message:

MER: Britt,
i don't believe in god
but i know you came from above
so this is my way to show you my undying love.
You're like me in every way,
and you make me smile every day.
There's no other girl out there for me,
I'll never be on another date.

Thank you, Britt.
I've found my soul mate

in my skin

another poem from mark! heh [23 Dec 2002|05:04am]
[ mood | awake ]

Subj: poem number435764387456
Date: 12/23/02 5:04:20 AM Central Standard Time
From: Mark Smokes Dro
To: Jewish kids

Your lips are like flowers,
I could get lost in them forever,
I don't care where we go,
As long as we're there together.

You're my world,
and my world is you,
If i wasnt with you,
I don't know what i'd do.

every day with you,
Is another adventure,
You're like my world,
You fill my center.

I don't want to dream or think,
Of living with out you,
I just want to let you know,
That forever and ever,
You'll be my boo<3


in my skin

new quiz and entry! [23 Dec 2002|12:26am]
[ mood | awake ]

Do you give a fuck?

This quiz style was designed by alanna, adapted by Batfish Designs, and created by Missanthropy

What Self-Mutilation Are You?

brought to you by Quizilla

I haven't slept at all in over 24 hours but I'm not even tired..I miss mark like crazy wtf is he! my eyes are red and itchy I wonder why hmph today I opened gifts with my gma fore I got lotion, bodywash, more lotion, perfume some french kind, a clown trinket box, a hand mirror made out of silver, a necklace and some earrings, and 15 dollars. great eh? 1 down 3 to go until I have all my gifts from this year..Houston and I arent talking lately ever since michael his cousin came to town hes been weird towards me and when i told him about mark he freaked on me..well i guess im going to go im wide awake though

in my skin

my baby wrote a poem for me! :x [21 Dec 2002|02:46am]
[ mood | loved ]

Subj: ½ of it ;x
Date: 12/20/02 1:11:51 AM Central Standard Time
From: MDMA Dealers
To: Jewish kids

Now we're finally together,
It feels like it took forever,
I look into your eyes,
And i can see the weather.

Your smile is like the sunrise,
Your lips are like the moon,
If you ever broke up with me,
That would be my demise.

I feel every pain you have,
I know everything you go through,
I want to be part of everything you want,
I want to be part of everything you do.

My only problem is that im not there,
All i want if my fingers running through your hair,
Baby i will brave you fears,
I just cant wait for you to be here.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Subj: (no subject)
Date: 12/21/02 2:42:37 AM Central Standard Time
From: MDMA Dealers
To: Jewish kids

When you're near,
I feel that its plain and clear,
We're just in love,
People might want to hate,
But we know that our love came from above.

Wherever we are,
In your house,
In the car,
Nothing matters,
All that matters is that we'll never be far,
Far from my mind is never where you'll be.

Baby I know you feel the same,
I don't have to spit the game,
I know you don't care,
And I cant wait until you sport my last name.

Okay now here's my poem to him <3

Subj: Baby <3
Date: 12/20/02 4:35:47 AM Central Standard Time
From: Jewish kids
To: MDMA Dealers

Exposure of Heart

Whispering words never expressed
Keeps my heart intensely undressed
There are a million things I want to say
But I can't find the words..
How do you express the depth of love in such a way?
You've changed me in more ways then one
Something not even I, at the best of times could have done.
I've never met anyone like you
Smart, Sexy, Brave, Sensitive, Honest, and True...
Qualities not even in the most powerful god could achieve
Maybe I'm being a little deep with this expression of self
But I'd rather tell you exactly how I feel then you never know
And me to leave my feelings upon a shelf.

holes in my skin

cute ass poem [18 Dec 2002|11:16pm]
[ mood | happy ]

Subj: (no subject)
Date: 12/18/02 10:34:49 PM Central Standard Time
From: MDMA Dealers
To: Jewish kids

I met you last nite,
you made my last day so bright,
I wanted to hold you,
but i decided to fight.

You're one in a million,
your personality matches me,
and maybe sometime later,
together we will be.

You make me smile at odd times,
your voice is like a song,
if friends is all,
then we'll be friends forever long.

<3 ;]

in my skin

quiz time! [18 Dec 2002|06:04am]
[ mood | sad ]

doggie style hair pull

Your Sex Position is Doggie Style w/ Hair Pull

Intense. Submissive... And just a tad bit painful.

You don't mind bending over to get porked -

As long as you're getting pulled and forked.

What's Your Sex Position?

More Great Quizzes from Quiz Diva

freaky kisser

You Are A Freaky Kisser!

From tounge and lip piercings to not so nice biting,

you're a basket full of kissing surprises.

In fact, your kissing syle is so ...

scary that you've been known to send a few dates packing.

No need to worry, somewhere in the world there is a kisser freaker than you!

How Do *You* Kiss?

More Great Quizzes from Quiz Diva


Your Secret Fetish Is Piercings!

Not only is the pain a big rush, as you know, piercings are a great sexual enhancer.

Sure, you may not be able to get a job with your punctured face,

but you will have incredible sex!

Kiss and suck away, but don't get your piercings locked with your lover's.

What's *Your* Secret Fetish? Click Here to Find Out!

More Great Quizzes from Quiz Diva

wild woman

You Are a Wild Woman!

Put down the whip and unlace those come-fuck-me boots!

You definitely qualify as kinky - and not just occasionally.

You've exhausted every fantasy, but you're always open to new ones.

Your sexual encounters are usually spiced with role-play, bondage, new positions,
props, and fun fetishes.

Are *You* Kinky? Click Here to Find Out!

More Great Quizzes from Quiz Diva

in my skin

hurt [15 Dec 2002|03:58am]
[ mood | blah ]

im so hurt right now its the 1 yr of my grandpa being dead and i feel more alone then ever before in my lifetime will there ever be that one person who takes my breath away and just feels me up with everything ive ever craved? i hope so i really do because id give anything for somethiing like that anything..

in my skin

for him. [14 Dec 2002|03:39am]
[ mood | blah ]

he came in with the storm
and left with the next sound of thunder
he left a mark on my heart
that will forever make me wonder..
did you care enough to stick it out
did you care enough to love without a doubt
or were you just scared to commit to me
is something wrong here
should i say something or just let it be
maybe love is something we do
not something we need.

in my skin

white dove [10 Dec 2002|08:34pm]

white dove white dove
why so sad?
being locked up
cant be so bad
you have everything, especially in dreams
people come and admire you
never touching just watching what you do
how can you be so lonely and cold
when you represent freedom I'm told
freedom has to be more then an illusion
but if it is why such confusion?...
white dove white dove
where can you be?
seems like yesterday you were here with me
singing a lovely song
while the breeze swayed through the trees
white dove white dove
i dont know if i told you
but you made me realize all that I was doing wrong
and you showed me I still could belong..
white dove white dove
you left me.. and youve been gone so long
to a far away place
leaving me with lonely tears on my face
i never could understand why vanished into the air
until now it is i know you left from fear
fear; to always be alone
but now you have grown into a stronger dove
white dove white dove
i thank you for teacing me the wisdom you behold
so i will keep growing and not become cold
you taught me about freedoms illusion &
you taught me about the worlds confusion
but most of you taught me how to belong
in a world that is often all too wrong.

Brittney Fore 11:23pm 7/2/01..
4 days before i went to rehab

in my skin

poems from october 2002 [10 Dec 2002|08:32pm]
[ mood | lonely ]

School Days were Pain
I walked through the halls feeling utterly alone
Nobody knew what I feeling I just wanted to go home
The gauzetape on my wrists were evident enough
That where I was in life was getting tough
My friends all called it stupid but it was my release
turning emotional to physical brought me peace
I never went back to school after that day
I went back to homeschool where I remain til this day
Maybe I couldn't handle the tension the people brought
but now I know if I ever feel alone people teasing me
is no longer an abstract thought.

Brittney Ann Fore

The Kiss Of Immortality
Never had I imagined the things I'd see
Or how much I craved for the kiss---
of immortality.

Eyes of such hunger and thirst
Despite the danger I craved
to be the first.

Her eyes were a cold gray
with a tint of ice blue
as I stared into them I felt my soul
starting to pull through.

The kiss of immortality came fast
and it was over just as it had begun
but I'll never forget her eyes or the
heat from the midnight sun.

Brittney Ann Fore

in my skin

understanding borderline personality disorder [09 Dec 2002|02:54am]
[ mood | awake ]

my head feels like exploding
my lungs arent taking air
i cant even get my thoughts together
when your not here
i always feel empty
and cannot control this fear
of being left alone..
i blame everything on others
and get so angry
i didnt used to be like this
whats happening to me?
i used to be calm and strong
but now i feel like im a disaster waiting to happen
i always feel as if im wrong
am i experiencing being a teen
or does this have something to do with my genes
ive been told im many things
and believed most of the words were true
maybe i should believe people who
tell me these hurtful words
and close myself off from the world
but then i wouldnt be living
id never grow up from being a little girl
i know i cant control these things
or maybe its just excuses
could all of this just be a bad dream?
where do i go from now how do i move on
do i put my best foot forward or is that wrong?
im so confused and i hate you so much
please dont ever leave me id miss you too much.
maybe i should just end it all and be another teen
who died from suicide but i know deep inside im not that weak
my head feels like it just sprung a leak..
im too tired to keep on with all these thoughts
even if i have to laugh myself to sleep
being able to rest is something i really need.

-brittney fore 2:40am 12/09/02

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